Without function or office.

adjective. Destitute of function, or of an appropriate organ. Darwin.

adjective. lacking a function

"Your claim that they are 'intrinsically functionless' is implausibly strong, given that functionality is always ... er, a function of contexts, which is to say, out and out extrinsic), and the radical transformation of contexts is the very thing at issue."

functionlessness  

28-round  altered  beetle-like  blow-dried  full-frontal